In Taiwan, Everything is Easy

By Joshua Dent "Hi ______! (insert English name here) How are you today?" NOTHING will KILL a conversation in an ESL classroom in Taiwan like the words "How are you? I can almost guarantee that you will always get the same robotic response "I'm fine, and you?" This is quite the difference from let's say asking a 13 year old American '"valley girl" the same question. I would imagine some 7th grade teachers probably avoid this question like the plague in fear of hearing about some girl's shopping trip for an entire period of Chemistry class. Trade "How are you?" for "Did you eat today?" For my approximately 211 days of residency here in "The Taiwan," I was desperately trying to find out why nobdoy would give you an honest response to this question. I can't tell you how many poor innocent children I wanted to shake the shit out of just to get another response besides "I'm fine....

I have been living and travelling in Taiwan for almost 7 months. It has been wild ride of up and down emotions that included a brutal battle with culture shock. Background " I want to strangle somebody." "Only 312 more days, 22 hours, 15 minutes, and 27 seconds more until my contract is up." I found the above quotes written in my daily journal. I am certain they should have been a pretty clear indication that something more than just the funny noise the lousy air conditioner makes at my place of employment was bothering me. I spent the first two months taking pictures and updating my Facebook status about 3-5 times a day. I was absolutely blown away by the magic and huge differences I was discovering in my daily adventures. Everything was NEW and EXCITING! I am not sure why it took me to realize something was wrong. Day 61(Roughly) The magic and excitement of watching a pack of 75 year old Taiwanese people gamble on checkers was bound t...

By Devon Banks   Imagine New York City during rush hour during the peak of summer. The air is heavy and humid and you are covered in a film of gritty sweat. Thankfully, you’ve got air-conditioning. The cars, like cattle, race quickly to try and beat the red lights. Bike messengers swerve in and out of traffic. Pedestrians, frustrated from the heat and hot sun, try to cross whenever they can. The noise from the construction beats through the windows and the glaring sun shines in your eyes. This is a nightmare commute. Driving in NYC rush hour isn’t even close to the nightmare I face daily. Trust me. I drive in one of Taiwan’s largest cities, Tainan, every day. The driving here is what nightmares are made of. Picture this: change every NYC car into a scooter, a two wheeled motorized vehicle that is capable of speeds up to 80km/h where the driver sits down on a comfy seat and controls brakes and acceleration with their hands. Continue to envision some scooters are br...

Background I currently reside in Jongli, Taiwan. Jongli is a smaller Taipei suburb that is roughly 40 minutes south of the capital city. I ABSOLUTELY adore both Taiwanese people, and Filipino people. I am only 6 months into experiencing both cultures. Both cultures seem to have many different morals and ideas. I respect the hell out of both of them. But, I think the main thing is that hey always treat you with the HIGHEST respect you could possibly even imagine. I have had friends of no longer than 5 minutes apologize that they had nothing to offer me at that very moment. I have been completely blown away by the kindness of both of them, I will also mention that I am 100% in the middle on the recent Taiwan Philipinnes tragedy. I am not in any way trying to prove who is right and wrong. I am actually trying to prove what would happen if we for once in our LIFETIMES forgot about who is right and wrong. Can we put our valued egos down as world citizens and government...

By Joshua Dent   #2 Pencils Did you ever hear a song so many times that you felt like you were one note away from deliberately gouging out your own eyes with a bright and shiny #2 pencil? Carly Rae’s “Here’s My Number, Call Me Maybe” had me reaching for my trusty #2 on many occasions this past winter in Jongli, Taiwan. “The Jongli” Never heard of Jongli, Taiwan? What’s wrong with you? I am just kidding. There is no reason you should know “The Jongli.” It is just a small suburb of Taiwan’s capital city Taipei. To me, it’s urban and flat, with a river that smells like the dumpster behind Mcdonald’s. Family Fun- 99 Red Balloons Style I really am not kidding about how bad I hate that song. I was very close to going absolutely Ape-Shit if I heard that song one more time. NOTHING in this ENTIRE world pissed me off more this last winter than day, after day, after day, after day of hearing the WORST song in American history. I would have to go back to the ear...

By Joshua Dent Did you ever have this weird and sick feeling in your stomach that you might be in China before the end of the month? I am assuming probably not, but stick with me as I explain. It is probably hard to figure out what I am up to these days. I can't decide myself. No Exit Letter for You Josh Dent My head is spinning in 7,000 different directions. My one bit of solitude is that I know I have no choice but to stay positive. That is the only way you can persevere through this kind of mess. The plan for today was round to take on Round 3 at the Immigration Office. The difficult part about handling matters of high importance in Taiwan is the idea of "losing face." This directly translates to people will give you the wrong information to avoid telling you that they don't know something. I was told last week, or doing round 2, that I would have to get some sort of "exit letter" from my previous employer to be eligible to apply for a 90 day...

B y Joshua Dent It was a fairly typical weather day for March here in "The Jongli." The sky was a bit overcast which is also normal. The early a.m. temps were hovering around 15-16 degrees Celsius. For those of you not familiar with Celsius, that means for me at least that shorts and a sweatshirt would be comfortable. I was really excited about today however. I was headed to "Monkey Mountain" in Kaoushing. I have been hiking hundreds of times back home in Arizona. But, the reason I was so excited was that you can actually see monkeys right next to you on this trail. My opinion is that part of being male is that ,around the time of your 13th birthday, it is only natural that you will start to adore monkeys for the rest of your adult life. For me, it isn't even the monkey's ablity to swing from tree to tree while eating banannas all day. It is actually even more simple than that. I will always smile from ear to ear if I see them put thei...

By Joshua Dent It was an above average winter day here temperature wise in "The Jongli." The sun was actually out for most of the day which can be a real delight in the winter time here due to the heavy amounts of constant rain and drizzle we normally receive. I left work from "The Shane School" at my normal 9pm departure time. I have bitched about this many times now. But, the diet just feels so scarce in protein and other vital nutrients in Taiwan. I have no scientific evidence. I am just going off how my body feels. I think this is because everything is just RICE, RICE, RICE, and more RICE. I actually feel like my Dad use to feel when we had Chicken Croquettes for dinner growing up as a kid. Chicken Croquettes were the frozen balls of must have been imitation chicken. My mom used to throw them in the microwave when she didn't feel like cooking for 5 people after a long shitty day at work. The Chicken Croquettes used to cause a 12 hour delaye...