In Taiwan, Everything is Easy

   In a hunk of gossip that shattered miserable expats around the world, Terrible Tom The Expat has officially ran out of stuff to bitch about. He was a shining king of Expats that love to bitch, for over two decades.  Tom has been bitching about stuff since he was less than knee-high. His parents still tell a terrible story about how they worked overtime for three months to buy him a trip to Disney World as a young bitchy kid. Tom returned the favor by spending seven days griping that Mickey Mouse stole his nose. Tom told his Grandma and Grandpa when he returned to his hometown of Bitchville, " If I see Mickey again, I'm gonna sock him a good one. He took my nose, and he won't give it back."    After a lifetime of bitching about stuff that he has absolutely no control over, Terrible Tom transcended himself into the perfect career for people that adore bitching so much. That is  a dead-end career of teaching ESL.    His profound bitching has taken him to nine

Mark Twain offers the reader such an eclectic variety of Tom Sawyer’s hilarious experiences from the time that first scent of crisp pages enters your aura. Young Tom’s profound ability to torture Aunt Polly will surely remind you of a childhood caretaker of your own that you also may have caused a raucous or two with. His cunning ability to get all the neighbor kids to whitewash the fence that was supposed to be his punishment is another fine example of Mr. Twain’s ability to dish out an over-abundance of tickets down Memory Lane. I’m sure you will remember a friend hoaxing you into doing some of their school or household work for you. Any adult reader with a remaining soul will find it difficult to not be transporting themselves back into those magical times. I would contest that even those with a tarnished soul, and wretched childhood, will still be looking at some strikeouts of childhood as some of the most powerful home runs.   As women, it would be a great injustice

You're never going to believe what happened. I pulled up to the Tao Sing Waterfall parking lot in Yunlin County today.  First, the coffee truck girl was not wearing a shirt. Instead of a shirt, she draped a Mexican flag around her top half. But, she only spoke Turkish. Then, a Taiwanese family arrived for coffee with three kids under five years old. But, the children were driving. Don't worry that they were driving a car. They were driving a plane. I say driving and not flying because their plane was having problems getting off the ground. It was a plane, powered by childrens' farts.  The mother was quite upset, because her son Frank  was constipated. His inability to fart made them late for a meeting later today.  Then, I was forced to play a game of One Shot One Shot,or Walk , The game is a favorite among Aboriginals. You have to take a shot of Gao Liang followed by a shot to the face from the oldest Tribesman, or walk home. I had to call a cab to the hos

  Pinky fingers in the classic 'up yours' position have revitalized a Taiwanese seaside town in Southern Taiwan, named Fenggang. This is especially great news since Fenggang only had one birth all of last year.     The up yours craze has even extended to the village elder.  He was rocking on his  gray and yellow rocking chair while half-asleep and pointed his pinky finger towards the sky when he  saw our team's cameras yesterday afternoon, while lipping some indistinguishable noises. A Junior High student at Frank's Aerodynamic English School, the only student in the high level,said he hasn't seen the town united like this since the day that the same town elder taught all fourteen kids in town how to draw stick figures. The hysteria around the up yours sign` began when a foreign English teacher was looking for a way to pass his time at a school of thirteen students, Frank's Aerodynamic English School. He usually spent his mornings trying not to

The Hong Kong Skyline- Who couldn't stare at this for days? :) Dining And Adventuring in Hong Kong      Day five of my travels to Hong Kong was relatively low-key compared to the previous four days.  I packed as much adventure as possible into the first four days in Hong Kong as I could possibly handle. Some of the highlights included a trip to Lantau Peak (Hong Kong's highest peak) , chowing down on some of the famous Hong Kong dish,  Dim Sum ,  chucking back some cheap beers from 7-11,  performing in a comedy open mic night at Hong Kong's longest running comedy club,  Take-Out Comedy , and not to mention a lot of awe-struck wonder; while checking out the randomness of  Honk Kong  . The final adventure of this fairly un-eventful day was nothing more than a seat on a park bench with a can of Heineken next to  Aberdeen Harbor . ( Aberdeen Harbor is next to a rather interesting floating village ) Aberdeen Harbor offers a perfect place for some nighttime peo